Paupu Fruits are Bananas
by Megumi-Sohma
Summary: The title.... Well, Paupu Fruits are very evil fruits, as you'll see by these stories thus making them Bananas also a very evil fruit . There's probably gonna be SoraRiku, Akuroku, and AkuDemy in the future. Probably...
1. Chapter 1

Sora smiled, grabbing a paoupu fruit and taking a big bite of one of the tips. Though the fruit had a reputation for its effect on those who eat it, bonding together the destiny of two people when they share the fruit, it made for a delicious snack, which is why most of the islanders ate it, they were just wary to make sure not to let more than one person eat from the same fruit. He smiled, enjoying the flavor thouroughly.

Suddenly, Kairi, Selphie, and Wakka called him over, for a race, the winner claiming a poorly crafted trophy, which was made by putting a hollowed out coconut which was chopped in half on top of a bundle of sticks, which made the goblet, and the words "Number One" carved into it. Just the kind of thing that was too stupid for someone like Riku to bother with, but Sora's hyper ADHD brain eagerly forgot about what he was doing, and he ran off to participate, leaving the paoupu fruit on the ground.

In case the readers care, Sora didn't win, the standings are as following: Kairi, Wakka, Selphie, Sora. He barely placed.

Apparently ants love Paoupu fruit.

Sora found Riku cracking up over something that looked like a star-shaped mound of ants. _Incredible!_ He thought, _Riku has trained the ants to do marching formations! _He clapped and ran to get Kairi so that she could see Rikus ant training skills.

"Uh… Is that a paoupu fruit?" Kairi asked when she saw the ants.

"Yeah… S-s-s-some idiot l-l-l-left a h-hahaha-half-eaten p-p-p-paoupu f-f-f-fruit on the g-g-ground and some ants got it!" Riku managed between fits of laughter.

_DOES THIS MEAN THAT I'M MARRIED TO ANTS????! _Sora's life was officially over.


	2. Chapter 2

**During the idea forming part of writing the story I was thinking up a way to make a dish that tricked someone into eating a paupu fruit (originally it was pie) but I saw something somewhere with sea salt ice cream. I wanted to include the salty-paupu ice cream into my story and I thought it fit KH better so I used the idea, so if you see a fan-comic somewhere with a similar concept, that's where I got it. And if you WROTE the fan comic, thank you so much. I got inspiration from it and it also helped my writers block. Also, I totally wanted to have a story where Axel acts all girly and happy.**

"Here Roxas, want a sea-salt ice cream?" Axel smiled, handing his best friend the aqua-colored Popsicle.

"Sure…" Roxas took the frozen treat reluctantly, but he wasn't really hungry. He then departed the kitchen of castle oblivion, just in time to miss seeing Axel squeal with joy.

"Hahahahahaha! Now Roxas shall be mine!" A malicious smile spread across Axel's face. _Step two in 'Operation: Capture Roxas' is complete! The plan:_

_Step 1: Put half a paupu fruit in a sea-salt ice cream bar, and eat the other half. (Complete)_

_Step 2: Give Roxas said Ice cream bar. (Complete)_

_Step 3: Roxas eats the ice cream bar and is destined to be with me forever._

_Step 4: 3 3 3_

He swooned just thinking about Step 4, _Ahh… Roxas…. Mmm… No, Axel! Focus; get your mind out of the gutter. _Axel blushed as Shonen-ai images filled his head. He instructed one of the lesser nobodies – the weird gray things – to go follow Roxas and report his activity.

Roxas stared at the popsicle feeling guilty about having to waste perfectly good ice cream, but he took it without thinking, and at the moment he wasn't that hungry, he was thinking about throwing it away when Demyx passed by. _Yes! I know, I'll give it to him. That little hyperling never passes up a chance for sugar!_

"Hey, Roxas, were you gonna' eat that?" Speak of the devil. Demyx stared down at Roxas with big greenish-blue eyes.

"Sure, here you go." What Roxas really wanted to say was: "How the heck are you older than me? Did Vexen accidently mess around with your brain so your mind couldn't develop or mature past the age of FOUR?!" He would've said it, but he had a reputation to uphold, as the innocent angsty youngest member of the organization. Acting like he had other things to do then brood wouldn't settle well with the fangirls. I mean come on. Look at Cloud and Riku.

"Lalalalalala!" Axels day couldn't get any better, his plan was going well, at least the first two steps, when one of the nobodies he sent on patrol approached with a report, "Oh, hello lesser being! Isn't it a great day to be alive?"

The lesser Nobody glared at Axel. Except it didn't have eyes. So just imagine it glaring. 'Cause it would if it could. But it delivered the report to Axel anyways. Even though it didn't use its mouth. Lesser Nobodies didn't talk. It was one of the mysteries of heartless creatures. Except for Org XIII, they all seemed to be missing a few essential body parts. Like mouths. Or eyes. Oh, forget it, back to the story. The Nobody would be angry. If it had emotions. Because heartless and Nobodies don't- (OH I'M RAMBLING AGAIN! GEEZ!!!). Long story short, Nobodies hate being called lesser beings by those in Organization thirteen, they have something of an inferiority complex. **Author Note: OMG I wasted a whole chapter on what should be like, ten words!**

"Who cares if Demyx has an ice-cream bar! You were supposed to watch _Roxas_!" Axel couldn't rely on the brainless lesser nobodies. Why doesn't he just pay someone else to do it, or trick Sora into thinking he could advance in the game and find Kairi if he stalked Roxas. He used the Sora method to get all the other work done. Like finding all the cards that Demyx lost because he tried to play poker with some heartless. Seriously. What numbskull tries to play poker with card-keys. He does that at hotels too. Almost always loses the room-keys. Which means that the Organization members spend vacation in the hallway of a hotel.

The Nobody tried to explain that Roxas had given the ice-cream to Axel as best as it could, you know, 'cause the fact that regular Nobodies were mute and all was a problem when giving reports. Looking at this now, I wonder if Xemnas really thought stuff through very often. After what might've been like, forty-bazillion years later, Axel understood.

Axel ran off so fast that there was not enough time for it to really sink into my memories, making it impossible to write about. So I have to cut this paragraph short.

"Hey Demyx, wanna' give me that popsicle. Like now. Before I destroy your sitar." Axel strained to keep his voice cheerful and not totally threatening.

Too late. Demyx was already hyped up on the idea of having sugar, "NUUUUUU! My icy-pop! Charlie you cannot have the sugary goodness of the candy mountain cave! Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun! Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun!"

Knowing that Demyx, who, (like Honey-senpai from Ouran) will kill if you take sweets from him, but Axel had to try. _If I die today, I die with the knowledge that Roxas wears footie pajamas. And that is all that I need in life. Well, I would've liked to have… Nevermind Axel, don't go all greedy now. I must try to be humble and awesome at the moment of my death. _"Look, Demyx… I didn't wanna do this but you leave me no choice!"

Silence.

After about fifteen seconds, it started to kick in. The temperature rose dramatically due to Axel's fire-wielding powers.

The ice cream melted, and the paupu fell to the floor.

"Oh, why was _that _in there? It must be a new flavor, cool!" Demyx seemed to have forgotten to be angry at Axel. Which upset Axel a little, because he had a noble death prepared and all that. Shame. He'd have to wait for another day to get Roxas. And to be dramatic.


End file.
